Sometimes I still can't fully comprehend how I got here. My life has completely changed from what it was this time last year.
This time last year I was fretting, miserable, heartbroken, and desolate thinking that my world had been dismantled by my Baton Rouge plans being thrown out the window. I was angry at my friends. I was anxious over where I would live, how I would make money, where I would work, and just generally freaking out about losing control of my life.
Without being lost - completely lost without any hope - I never would have been found.
I know now that it was all in the plan. I was being led to where I am now. I needed Christ to pick me up and carry me for a little while, until I was strong enough to walk alongside Him.
I'm in the process of building a relationship with a young gent as a Christian for the very first time. I'm trying to make sure that my priorities stay right and that I don't become a stumbling block for him either. I am trying to build a love with him based on the model given by Christ. Patience, kindness, free from anger and jealousy and resentment. I know that the only way a relationship will last and be fulfilling is if it's built with Christ at the foundation. I'm so happy. I've never been happy in a relationship - that's why I've avoided them for the past three years. I had decided that I was happier alone than struggling to try to be happy with someone else. I never could have imagined being this happy with someone else. It's as easy as breathing as long as my priorities stay on track.
I'm realizing as I write this that I should build ALL of my relationships with Christ at the center. *ding* There goes the lightbulb. Even with people who don't believe in God or don't follow Christ, I am the person responsible for growing that relationship in the right way. I should try harder to really make an effort to focus in on those attributes of love with all the folks I'm in contact with. What a difference it would make. Challenge accepted.
<3 Good night
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